DARWIN is on his 12th year of teaching, currently at Springville High School teaching astronomy, geology, environmental science, and physics. He also teaches physics at UVU for a 7 week STEM summer school program for junior high students. He also teaches teenagers in our church ward. He's super busy, but still makes time to be an awesome dad and husband.
To start off let me say that I love, LoVe, LOVE being a mom! I told my mother-in-law the other day that I'm seriously living my dream job right now and loving every second of it! Who wouldn't love hanging out with a beautiful princess everyday? Seriously. Since our little one has joined our family we've had LOTS of big "ups" moments and luckily only one down to be honest...my current nemesis: BREASTFEEDING.
I've wanted soo bad to succeed with breastfeeding our little one because I know it's what's best for her. Before she was born I read several breastfeeding books and attended a breastfeeding class. But, she never really got the hang of latching on, even with a nipple shield. Then at about 2 weeks old she decided she really didn't want to breastfeed and would fight me the whole time I'd try to feed her--not to mention she wasn't getting much food because she wouldn't eat. So, I made the decision to pump my milk and feed it to her in a bottle. Not only have I just been pumping so she could eat, I've been using 2 hand pumps for the last month. I've been so diligent and we've really had a good routine going. It hasn't been too big of a deal because we're not out in public a whole lot. We were satisfied with our routine...until this past Sunday.
D & I decided it would be safe enough to take A to church this last Sunday because it was Stake Conference and we figured we wouldn't run into too many excited people from our ward wanting to see our new addition. And since we wouldn't be changing classes every hour we figured we'd do pretty well to keep her away from germs. She did really well to be honest. But about an hour into Stake Conference she got hungry, and since she won't take formula anymore (it was our back-up feeding plan for when we were in public) I had no choice but go to the mother's lounge and pump milk for her. It really wasn't a huge deal, but going in there to pump (being the only mom in there without a baby) made me realize how jealous I was of the other moms who were breastfeeding their babies. I honestly felt so silly being in there without my baby, pumping milk for her. I didn't feel like the other mom's were judging me, but I honestly felt jealous. I came home from Stake Conference determined to try again. Sadly that's probably the only thing I got out of Stake Conference because I was so preoccupied with keeping my new baby away from germs and keeping her quiet during her first time at church.
So, today was the day. We attempted breastfeeding again this morning, and it was a HUGE success!! Until we tried to switch sides...now she's back to fighting me every time I try to breastfeed. I know I've only been trying this again for just today, but with how well she did the first time I think it really got my hopes up that it was going to be a piece of cake. How wrong I was!! I'm trying to figure out why she did so awesome the first time this morning after nearly a month of not trying to breastfeed. I'm trying really hard to not get frustrated with myself like I did a month ago when things weren't going like I'd hoped. I guess I just need a little encouragement, and tips from successful breastfeeders would be AWESOME too. So, feel free to help relieve some of my stress and frustration over breastfeeding by leaving me some encouragement and tips! I'll gladly take them!!!
Brock and the Middleton Vikings travel team
10 years ago
13 comments:
You can do it if you need some one to talk to I am here to talk too
Well I don't have any good tips, but I just want you to know that you are not alone in struggling with breastfeeding! At about 2 months my little one would only breastfeed well first thing in the morning and the rest of the day I pumped. I know what you are going through! Do you have an electric pump? They are lifesavers! Just keep working at it, but I found with my baby that as long as he was getting milk, whether from a bottle or me, it was all good :)
First off, she will be healthy & happy whether you breastfeed or bottle feed her. I've done it both ways & I see no difference in the health of my kids. But I know that "jealous" feeling & if you really want it & it's not driving you completely crazy, then don't give up!! She's still very young, she'll catch on.
Second, if you're only using hand pumps, an electric pump will make your life soo much easier. I have one you can borrow if you need to.
The only tips I have are don't wait until she's super hungry to try--you'll both get very frustrated. And when you're helping her latch on, have your hand supporting her neck more than her head. When I held the back of the baby's head & tried to bring them to the breast, they'd always resist. But when I supported the neck instead so they had a little more freedom of movement, they'd be more cooperative.
Hope this helps! Your feelings are totally normal--it's a roller coaster for the first several months, even when it's going well. You can do it!! :)
Breastfeeding is hard, I won't lie. But if you can't get past the bumps, etc. it is totally worth it.
First of all, I would call your local La Leche League. They are free help and have helped me through major nursing problems. In Utah, they even have a phone line set up - 801-264-LOVE ... I have friends who have used this line before and they said it was a huge blessing. I was seriously bleeding like crazy from thrush and whatever else and they helped me out tremendously. Such great women.
If it were me, I would try to avoid pumping if you can. I know you've been doing it successfully and that's great, but it's like you are feeding the baby twice and that sounds like way too much work. I've seen women use droppers full of breast milk next to their nipples to get babies to latch on. Just a thought.
Anyway, hang in there. Call La Leche League if you can. Seriously.
I'm sure you've already done these things, but have you seen a lactation specialist? They can be helpful. The other thing I would try is giving her the opportunity to nurse at every feeding no matter what. She might just get the hang of it, especially if she did so well that time. But the bottom line is she just needs to be fed. So as long as you're able to pump, she'll have everything she needs and more. It's not easy, but it's worth it!
You would think that Breastfeeding would be the easiest thing in the world to do, because it's the natural thing to do! With my first born Kai, we would have to tease him and drip sugar water on my breast to get him to latch on. For 2 weeks I did this until he finally caught on! Keep trying! Don't give up! There are also lactation specialist that would be more then happy to help you! Take them up on the offer, that's what they are there are! It does get easier, I promise! Just hang in there!
"Just keep swimming."
Way to go Kiara! What you have already done is amazing and difficult. My advice is also as others have said... Get some help! There is so much out there. You can only do so much, baby has to cooerate and learn to and a professional will know all sorts of tricks. I too have struggled to nurse all three of my girls. My second suggestion is, just take it one day at a time. Rejoice over small improvements. With my first two girls I told myself, " I'll nurse one more week, just one." I'd work through each day of that week and get to the next and think, ok, maybe one more. In the end, I was able to bear so much longer then I ever thought possible. Get a blessing from Darwin and make a plan with a specialist. Good luck!! Sending you a hug!! And curse all those wretched moms and babies that nurse so easily!!!! (I'm joking on that last part...) ;-)
I am exclusively pumping so I can't give you any tips about breastfeeding. But if breastfeeding doesn't work out I would get a double electric pump. We got ours on Craigslist and just bought new tubes, etc. Then I got one of the these:
http://www.amazon.com/Simple-Wishes-Hands-Free-Breastpump-XS/dp/B00295MQLU/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1299104595&sr=8-1
It was really hard at first but now I only have to pump once every 5 hours for about 15 minutes and I have enough milk for my 5 1/2 month old. It is hard to not beat yourself up over breastfeeding (trust me I have struggled with both my children). Just do your best and try to relax and enjoy your baby. You are already a great mom!!
Oh breast feeding!! Nightmare with Zoey! Great with Logan! Zoey would not latch on and loved the instance gratification she got with a bottle, so I decided to do the pumping. At 9 weeks I had a melt down. I was getting up in the middle of the night to pump, then bottle feed her and I was working and basically a miserable momma. I decided to switch to formula. I had to realize that I wanted to me a happy momma most of all. Maybe you could try some different formulas to see if there is one she likes. Jake and I love the little pre-made formula bottles that you can just throw in your diaper bag with a nipple. You don't have to worry about refridgerating them.
Logan.... he is doing well with breast feeding. It took us a while to get a good thing going and I just stuck with it and it worked out.
Just keep trying. I will be thinking of you. You will be a good mom if she does or does not breast feed and MAJOR props with the pumping! That is the hardest of all!!
I'm so sorry you're struggling! I too understand that frustration arrrggg! Even though we adopted for two months before our baby got here I took natural supplements and pumped religiously just to bring in a milk supply so that I could do the "most healthy" thing possible (I also REALLY wanted the bonding!) She did alright at first (we had to use a supplement tube) but she or I would get frustrated and back to square one we would go! She was breastfed for the first few months and then went on formula full time-it was my "ideal" but I knew that if it was meant to be it would happen and being frustrated wouldn't do me or my sweet new baby any good! Be easy on yourself I think everyone has tough times but as you know and will find out even MORE (yeah) the good FAR OUT WEIGHS THE BAD!!
I am so sorry you are having such hard time right now :( We love you guys! I hope it gets easier for you, and I can't wait to see you and your beautiful family this weekend!!
I know I am a little late commenting, and its going to repeat a lot of what has been said. I had a MAJOR meltdown with R before we put her on formula. I was SO bugged that I had to pump, when breastfeeding was the "natural" way of doing it. First off, when I found out that you were still hand pumping I almost starting crying for you. I tried hand pumping here with P and after 3 days of that, I realized that was a joke! GET AN ELECTRIC PUMP!!!!!! I read that one of your friends have one, or Art City Pharmacy rents them!!!! Second of all, I got help with R and we used a little tube hooked to a syringe(spl?) with milk. And when she would latch on(or attempt) sqeeze a little out. It worked. They have funny little tricks. Last of all do what you need to do to be happy. Even if it means to switch to formula. There are a lot of boob natzis out there, but if you aren't happy during that time you will miss a great bonding time, and yes you can still bond with formula. Do what you need!!! Love you babe, and know that SO many women have had the same problems, you aren't alone!!!!!!
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